DO YOU OWN A GUN RACK?

Psycho Hose Beast:

An ultra-clingy, crazy-ass, delusional-and/or-pathological
bitch that wont accept reality, perhaps an old flame who
can't comprehend the term "It's Over".

There are 3 things in life that are unavoidable: Taxes, Death & Crazy Ass Bitches. The PHB is undoubtedly unavoidable. You've heard the term, you're buddy dated one in college, hell you've got one that won't stop calling as we speak. I personally love crazy girls but only from a far. The PHB is entertaining as hell and personally the crazier that they are the more sane you look. Don't get me wrong all girls have a crazy streak some worst then others. Wayne's World by far still exhibits the best on screen PHB performance ever!

Stacy: Happy anniversary, Wayne.
Wayne Campbell: Stacy, we broke up two months ago.
Stacy: Well, that doesn't mean we can't still go out, does it?
Wayne Campbell: Well, it does actually, that's what breaking up is.

Stacy: Well, don't you want to open your present?
Wayne Campbell: If it's a severed head I'm going to be very upset
Stacy: Open it.
Wayne Campbell: What is it?
Stacy: It's a gun rack.
Wayne Campbell: A gun rack... a gun rack. I don't even own *a* gun, let alone many guns that would necessitate an entire rack. What am I gonna do... with a gun rack?
Stacy: You don't like it? Fine. You know Wayne, if you're not careful, you're going to lose me.
Wayne Campbell: I lost you 2 months ago. We broke up. Are you mental? Get the net!

You might be a PHB if one or more of the following apply to you:

• Go to your blog immediately after a break up and post information/pictures regarding your ex such as: John has crabs and he shits in his underwear at least twice a week!

• Have every episode of cheaters on Tivo

• Keyed, spit, spray painted, dented, or shatter a window on a car

• Cursed the day that caller id and or call blocking was invented

• Know the voice mail menu's for T mobile, Sprint, Verizon, & AT&T by heart

• Have spent hours playing Detective Dan trying to figure out your boy friends password for: myspace, facebook, email, voice mail etc.

• Wasted more then $20 bucks in gas driving up and down a street you don't reside on

• Think that Valentines Day is the greatest holiday ever invented

• Rage is your favorite emotion

• Have trouble keeping girl friends because you know that there secretly fucking your boy friend

• Think that Megan Fox has nothing on you

• Sisters and moms make you jealous

• Interrogation is your idea of a fun Saturday night

• You believe that strip clubs are the root of all evil

• If he hasn't said I love you by the third date then the relationships going nowhere

• Think that the term "boys night" only exist at gay bars

• Tiffany's is your favorite store in fact you've been registered there since high school

• Becoming a part of his family is a requirement not a privilege
  

• Have never been "dumped"

The list could go on and on... Crazy girls are like are like bad blow jobs, you'll never turn one down but one is all you need to know that teeth hurt!

What's your best PHB experience??

DO I LOOK LIKE A SLUT?

After writing the OG stalking entry I decided to do a spin off regarding home base aka SEX. How does the playing field that we use as adults vary from the playing field of our adolescence? Well I think it depends on the person. I for one will be the first to admit that I’m a little sluttier then most of my friends, I’m not the sluttiest one but I’m up there on the list. And in my own opinion I don't think that I’m slutty at all, I would say that I’m in touch with my sexuality. OK I’m a whore so what... I like to get laid, I'm STD free and I swallow! (OMG I can hear the gasps!) So with that being said I call bullshit on the aged old myth: If a man sleeps with numerous women he’s consider a pimp but if a woman sleeps around she’s considered a slut! HELLO men love sluts!! Sure men will be the last ones to admit it but without slutty women men all across the world wouldn’t be getting laid. Men love sluttly girls for three reasons:

1. They know that if they take you home they will get laid.
2. Since you’re kind of slutty they know that you are experienced so the sex will be pretty good.
3. Because condoms now a days generally work wonders from protecting against STD’s.

Let’s say that I’m a single guy at a bar looking to get laid and at the end of the night I’ve got two bitches to choose from: Sister Sara or Blow Job Betty. I’m going home with BJB because I know that she’s got enough liquid courage in her to throw her hand down my pants on the cab ride home. With BJB the deals already been sealed (aka less convincing on the mans end) with SS I would have to work for it. And frankly unless you’re a super model like Heidi Klum a man generally wants to put forth the least bit effort as possible when it comes to getting laid. Which brings me to another myth that I call bullshit on: A man will fuck a slut any day of the week but he would never marry one! WHAT, why the fuck not!! I think that a healthy marriage is built on a healthy sexual relationship or at least 60% of it. Without great sex both husband and wife are going to stray to find better sex which will eventually lead to the demise their marriage anyways. So why not marry a slut to begin with? I love it when a man says I could never bring her home to meet my mom. Why not does your new slutty girlfriend have her entire fuck list tattooed on her forehead? Unless she has mad cold sore and scabs hanging off of her lips it’s pretty safe to say that your mom won’t know that she was kind of slutty until she met you.

And eventually in every relationship the number question is going to pop up: So how many people have you slept with? I have a hard time understanding why this question is such a deal breaker for relationships. If you already like me then why is the number of people that I’ve fucked even an issue? For some reason ALL men want to know the answer to this question, it’s like they can’t take the relationship to the next level without knowing. Since I’m not a man I can only assume that they want to know because it has something to do with their man hood and it will let them know if their going to be able to satisfy you or not. Well FYI we could solve that problem by just having sex. Nothing good will come out of the number conversation because:

1. Even if you tell your partner the truthful # they won’t believe you.
2. If your partner does believe you and the # is high your partner will feel inadequate and obsess over it for a life time.
3. It doesn’t matter what # you admit to because your partner is going to apply the “golden rule” anyways.

Ahh the “golden rule” my personal fave: If a man or a woman says that they have slept with X amount of people multiple that # by 3 and tada you have the golden # of people that they fucked. That equation is about as fool proof as “pulling out”! I will be the first to admit that my slut phase was one of the best times of my life, I was 19 and it lasted for about a year. Sure there are a few people that I would like to take off of my list but I don’t regret any of them. And unlike most women if my partner asked about my past I would have no problem telling them the truth about the number of people that I’ve slept with. I wouldn’t want to be with anyone that judged me based upon my past sexual experiences anyways.

I couldn’t possibly write this entry with out including my playing field.

MIDDLE SCHOOL

1st Base = Hugging/Kissing (Weak)

2nd Base = Fondling/Dry Humping (Strong)

3rd Base = Finger Banging/Hand Jobs (Hardcore)

Home Run = SEX (Whore)

ADULT HOOD

1st Date = 1st + 2nd Depending on looks and Alcohol consumption

2nd Date = Is the old 3rd Base

3rd Date = Awkward Sex

Home Run = Better Sex

So the question stands are you sluttier then me?

Merry Sex-mas Bitches!

WHAT THE FUCK EVER HAPPENED TO OG STALKING??

1. The Internet

2. MySpace

3. Face Book

When I was in 7th grade I started stalking DT, he was the epitome and demise of my summer/8^th grade year. It all started back in the day when I was Chillin with my homies on 16^th & Palm. And by homies I mean well educated white kids living in a beach city where the average family median is $400,000.00, we bad! We were playing a game of Truth or Dare, it was my turn and of course I choose dare. At that very moment there was a boy across the street walking his dog. Debo dared me to go over and kiss him on the lips. Anybody that knows me personally knows that I’m always game, always have been and always will be. So I got up walked across the street over to the boy and asked him “If I could kiss him on the lips?” He said yes and it was by far the greatest 2 ½ seconds of my entire existents. That’s when I started my career as an armature stalker. Since social networking sites were non-existent I had to stalk DT like an OG. Instead of boring you with every last lame ass detail of DT’s life I composed a list of my greatest stalking techniques.

• Spending countless hours in the school library going through yearbooks trying to figure out that MoFo’s name. The reason that it took so long was because DT was 3 years older then me, so while I was in 7^th grade he was in High school.

• Changing my route so that I would purposely have to walk by his house on the way to and from school.

• Hanging out with a girl that treated me like shit just because she lived across the street from DT.

• Looking up his phone number in the white pages so that I could call him repeatedly just to hang up.

• Leaving him notes in his mail box telling him things that were so 1996 like you’re “The Bomb…Digity” ALL unsigned of course.

• Getting up the balls to knock on his front door. It only happened once and he wasn’t home so I ended up telling his dad some bullshit story about my cat being lost.

Eventually half way through my 8^th grade year my infatuation with DT ended. I had my first boyfriend; period and my first run at 3^rd base (aka finger banging & hand jobs). But DT and I would eventually cross paths again in high school and briefly in college. When I was in 9^th grade DT was a senior. He had a GF and we had conflicting schedules due to our age difference so I rarely saw him. Now you have to realize that even though it was 98’ and the internet was more widely accessible my family was still using prodigy and the closest thing to MySpace was internet chat rooms. The OG thing to do back then was cruse chat rooms while your parents were gone and have “Cyber Sex” with people that were probably twice your age and weighed at least 4 bills. Graduation came and went and once again DT was a forgotten soul from my childhood past, until college that is. And yes I went to graduation to see him walk, I was a fuckin stalker what did you expect! I hadn’t even noticed him on the first day of class until roll call. It had been 4 years since our last encounter (me stalking him at graduation). As I turned around to peep his shit my heart started to pound and I quickly had a flash back of 7^th grade, of that single day that changed my young adult hood. DT and I ended up having lunch about a week later. At lunch I felt compelled to tell him about all of my crazy stalking antics. DT flashed me that “You’re a crazy bitch look” and in all truth he said that he didn’t have any recollection of the kiss, calls, notes ect. I was taken aback, nothing, mother fuckin nothing. Right then and there it was over for me. The funny part was that if he had remembered at least on of those things I probably would have sucked his dick right then and there. Hey if an opportunity presents itself you better take it, because if you don’t there’s always a sluttier girl behind you who will. And in true woman style, once he was in it to hit it I was in it to quit it! To me there’s just something so gratifying about putting in the man hours to stalk someone OG style. I love all of the new technology that has been invented over the past 10 years and I wouldn’t trade it for the world. But it saddens me that when my daughter has her first crush all of his info will only be one click away. There’s also something kind of refreshing about people who aren’t on social networking sights. To my knowledge my BF doesn’t have any so when I want to know something about him I physically have to ask him a question. Even though DT will never be back on my hit it list I see him around town from time to time and when I do those memories from 1996 always come rushing back.

So who are you stalking and how??

Is Ryan Gosling a pussy?

Or does he just play one in the notebook?

Now I know what you’re thinking “What the fuck are you talking about! You stupid bitch! Ryan Gosling was the best part of that goddamn movie – ugh!” and I completely agree. But seriously ladies does Noah exist in real life?? Um NO! It’s called a movie, but it’s always nice to dream. Besides any man that would put up with that much shit form woman is either gay or imaginary. I’ve watched the notebook about 5 times now and every time I watch it I want to smack the shit out of that bitch Allie and tell her to grow the fuck up! And then I want to give her a big ass hug and cry my eyes out and tell her how lucky she is. Not only does she have Noah but she also has “what’s his face” who is also willing to eat fresh shit out of her ass!! Then from out of nowhere the rage comes back and I want to key the word cunt onto the hood of her car in GINORMOUS LETTERS!

The debate about Noah could go on for hour’s even days but what I really want to know is…

If you watch The Notebook and you cry does that make you a pussy?

If you watch The Notebook and you don’t cry does that make you a hard ass bitch?

Two weeks ago I was rappin with one of my besties and somehow The Notebook came up. My bestie had mentioned that she had never seen it. WHAT!!!! I replied “you’ve never seen The fuckin Notebook!!” Holy shit I thought that was like a requirement/right of passage into womanhood, like your period and shit! Now I’m not trying to make it seem like The NB is the BEST love story of all time, hell I didn’t even pay to go see it in the theaters. But it’s good enough to make me cry my ass off and give a BJ to the first random dude that looks my way.

The last time I watched The Notebook was about two years ago with my posse from the 207. During the movie my GF and I were trying to conceal the fact that we were sobbing our asses off while our other GF was sitting there with her arms crossed like a bad ass bitch. My bad ass GF didn’t even shed a single tear. She then shot us a look that said “Are you bitches fuckin kidding me, you wouldn’t even make it one day in prison.” After the movie my sobbing GF and I had a ton of questions for our Bad ass GF like:

Why didn’t you cry?

Are you a Dyke (Butch)? (Not that we discriminate)

You don’t want to suck Noah off?

And the answers that we got were:

I’m just a HARD ASS BITCH and I cry for no man!! (Dayum)

No

And of course I'd suck his dick!

And that was that.

So I finally rented The NB for my bestie and I to watch. I pre-warned her to drink a gallon of water because she was going to be dehydrated as shit when the movie was over. Bitch had no idea that she was about to resemble that chick from the R. Kelly video (Drip, drip, drip). My bestie proceeded to tell me about how much she hates love stories, she thinks that they are cheesy and that there was no way in HELL she would cry!

Needless to say after watching The NB my bestie was shedding tears like she had just started her period while wearing white pants on a first date! I turned towards my bestie with red eyes and tissues shoved up each one of my nostrils and once again muttered the question “Does this mean that were pussies??”

I’ve come to the conclusion that I myself am just in touch with my inner pussy (aka EMO side) and that I will always cry when I watch The Notebook. I admit it I’m a pussy, I’m shaved and I’m proud!

Also I’ve discovered that every circle of friends needs a HARD ASS BITCH in their gang. Because when things are shitty and times are tough she’ll be the glue that holds the posse together much like the wife of a dysfunctional marriage.

FYI – Warning to all chicks that live in downtown H.B. the Blockbuster at Sea Cliff doesn’t have a single copy of The NB??? Apparently all of the originals got jacked and the store never received any replacements (and people say The NB blows!)

IS THE GRASS REALLY GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE?

To be honest i'm not sure yet. But I can tell you that it's usually well groomed, smells fantastic and the thought of touching it makes you fell like Amy Winehouse finding a crack rock the size of her fist in that rats nest of hers that she calls hair.

Where as the thought of your significant others grass (assuming that you've been together for at least 3 years or are married) is some what along the lines of Chewbacca, Taste like like ass and the thought of having to pretend to be attracted to it almost makes leukemia seem bearable.

OK maybe my last example is a little over board but you get the point. I feel like this post could go in so many different directions: Is cheating OK (No), What if it's only an emo affair and not a physical relationship (It's still an affair), Should he/she leave their partner for me (No because your new relationship is built on lies), What if I get caught (You should have never taken your panties off in the first place), It's complicated there's kids involved (You should have thought about that in the first place), Our affair is different we love each other (Then end your other relationship) All of the answers listed above are the morally right answers according to the society that we live in. But guess what times are a changin: Swingers clubs are every where, 90% of bitches have HPV and our new president is black.

So with all that said is the grass really greener on the other side??

Yes, it will always be. I think that the real question is "Is it worth it?"

I can't answer that question for you nor can God, Gandhi or that Bitch down the street that's always up in your biz-nass. "Is it worth it?" is a question that can only be answered by the two of you (Aka you the whore bag & he the douche bag) I kid, I kid!

I think that the question that you really need to ask yourselves is: What is lacking from my current relationship that makes this affair fell so right?

AND...

If your in an affair where your single and your lover is attached/married you need to ask yourself: Why are you so attracted to your lover and not willing to meet somebody else that is single?

Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

I CALL BULLSHIT ON...

A couple of years ago Donna Deliva wrote a great article titled "I Call Bullshit…On Tons of Stuff." Every time that I come across this little written piece of greatness it brings a chuckle to my stomach and a "Fuck Yeah" to my lips. After reading Donna's article again I realized that I had some bullshit that I wanted to rant about too!!

I CALL BULLSHIT ON...

HEF'S GIRLFRIENDS
Does anybody truly believe that the sex could be AMAZING enough to make chicks that hot stick around?? Or do money, fame, fortune and laziness drive these gorgeous women to stay with Mr. Wrinkly Viagra Penis?? Call me crazy but I'm going with the money option! 5 more years and those bitches will be laughing all the way to the bank, or at least Holly will be! On the other hand I know that this is kind of fucked up but wouldn't it be funny if Hef didn't even leave them a dime. Don't hate the player, hate the game!

FLYING CARS
Shouldn't we have these by now anyways! The fifties was like fifty years ago and where the fuck are all the flying vehicles. Lord knows that I'd rather be a Jetson over a Flintstone any day of the week, but seriously even if flying cars existed would people be able to handle it? FUCK NO! I can't even drive down the 405 tomorrow morning with out witnessing an accident. We can't even stay in the lines that are already pre-marked for our convenience. Can you even imagine how freaking hard it would be to fly around in the air in a synchronized direction with out hitting each other head on! Babababababullshit!

SCREENING CALLS AND TEXTING
If you call me and I call you right back, ANSWER THE FUCKING PHONE! What is this 7th grade? We've been lucky enough to upgrade from paging 420 and 143 so stop acting like you're SO important, you called me remember? This irritates the shit out of me. If I call you and you don't answer then whatev's. But if I call you and you don't answer but you text me right back, then you're basically telling me to go fuck myself. Unless you're at work or in court answer your phone genius that's what it's for.

QUITTING SMOKING
If you're ready and it's what you really want then good for you. Your now going to live 10 years longer then I am and you'll still sound like jail bait over the phone. But if you're not really ready then don't do it. And don't try to recruit everyone you know to stop smoking. I don't want any of your fucking gum or patches; I don't want to hear about how "my" lungs look like an asshole. Just because you're all sweaty, eating tons of food and biting your nails doesn't mean that you get to treat everyone else like shit. FYI people smoke because they want to. So If your going to quit then quit, end of story.

VOTING V. OPINION
If you're going to be all coked up and talk to me for the next 5 hours about how the next presidential candidates are corrupt and how the world is falling apart, then you better be able to REP your shit. If you're going to tell me that I'm not green enough and that my vote matters, then your vote better count to. Because if I find out that you're not even registered to vote then I automatically get to beat the shit out of you. If you're going to have an opinion on "everything" that's going on in the world and tell me that my views are "wrong" then you better be: registered to vote, actually vote and/or share your weed with your friends, family and neighbors.

DONNA CALLS BULLSHIT ON…

BIG BROTHER
Hey, Craig, stop calling pot "Al Green" and coke "Barry White" when you talk to me on the phone. The FBI are not listening. What kind of budget do you think they have? You'd need three hundred million people to monitor three hundred million people that closely. Is there another America in another dimension that's keeping tabs on us?

SURVIVING ANIMAL ATTACKS
Have you heard what you're supposed to do when pit bulls attack? You're supposed to collapse under them, and as they jump up on you to bite your face, you're supposed to grab them by the neck and strangle them. Sure, I can do that. Of course, I'll have to practice it ten thousand times so it's a natural reflex, but yeah, I can strangle flying pit bulls, no problem. I'm a female ninja.

Dogs smelling fear, punching sharks in the nose, covering a crocodile's eyes, playing dead when bears are around—bullshit. Bears can rip off your head the same way we hit a T-ball off that little post. Like I'm going to lie there and play dead while he sticks his wet nose in my ear and starts sniffing.

Shit my pants and start crying—that I can do.

FAKING ORGASMS
What guy insists his girlfriend cums every time? Andrew Dice Clay? An in-the-closet fag? I'm sorry, but that is bullshit. The majority of women always cum from being eaten out and occasionally cum from getting fucked. Guys know that. What, do you pretend to faint from ecstasy and roll your eyes back in your head like you're having a seizure, too? Outside of Meg Ryan in When Harry Met Sally, I call bullshit on women faking orgasms.

SEXISM
You heard me. I know things are bad for prostitutes in Southeast Asia and everything, but me and my sister Kate have had nothing but a gay old time here in North America since day one. And we grew up dad-less in a shitty part of New York. If anyone in our family can complain about sexism it would have to be my little brother, Carl. He wants to be a fireman, but girls wrecked it. Used to be you had to lift 180 pounds to get the job, but women couldn't do that so they lowered it to 100 pounds. What the fuck? Why don't they lower the requirements for urinals so women can use those too? Now you have these 180-pound firemen scared shitless of going into a burning building with their female partner because they know she can't carry him out.

Maybe I'm just ignorant, but once you take all the bonuses of being a chick into account, whining about sexism sounds like total bullshit to me.

ART
Did you ever read Dan Clowes' Art School Confidential comic? He's making it into a movie. Basically, it calls bullshit on art school and points out that anything they teach you that isn't a specific technical skill or art history is totally subjective and a complete waste of time. Don't believe me? Ask an art-school graduate. It's a scam. Come to think of it, art is a fucking scam. Some Japanese millionaire gives you $400,000 to mount three hundred taps on a wall that exude hot rubber? Wow. You can come up with weird ideas and hire carpenters and engineers to spend three weeks carrying them out. Fuck artists. None of them can even draw hands. You know who does valid art? All those taxidermists that make walruses and wolves and cougars look real at the natural science museum. They may not wear leather jackets with one sleeve and fuck the Hilton sisters, but at least they are actually talented.

AMERICA IS RICH
BUUUULLLLSHIIIIIT. I am flat broke and so is America. Sure, Bangladesh still uses mopeds from the 60s and we have twenty million SUVs, but that's still only 6 percent of the population. And how many of those people can actually afford to be driving them? The point is, most Americans' lives are like Roseanne. The average American owes $7,000 on his credit card. That's a lot of money when the median annual salary is $38,000 a year. Everyone thinks we are the richest people in the world and everyone else is starving, but that's bullshit. We only have the sixth-highest standard of living in the world. We're not just below all those hippie European places like Belgium, Norway, and Sweden; we're also below fucking Australia. According to the UN, it's Canada that everyone is tripping over themselves trying to get to. The only ones pushing down our doors are Mexicans that are dying of starvation. I call bullshit on us being so rich.

CONDOMS
I call bullshit on those things. Unless you're a total slut in a bad neighborhood, you don't really need condoms. Especially in high school, when everyone is too inexperienced to have STDs. Oh, and AIDS (or should I say "SHMAIDS"). I call a huge fucking gigantic bullshit on that stupid disease. Sorry, but middle-class kids who don't have gay sex and never use needles (i.e. 80 percent of North America) DON'T GET AIDS. I know hundreds of people, even some who died of AIDS, but they were either gay or junkies. Do you know anyone who knows anyone who knows anyone who knows anyone who isn't gay or a needle user but got AIDS anyway? No, you don't.

And STDs? Big whoop. The worst ones I've ever heard of anyone getting are herpes and venereal warts. Herpes tends to go away after the first two outbreaks, and venereal warts are taken care of with a few blasts of liquid nitrogen. I know that technically the virus is with you forever, but talk to someone who got herpes or VWs more than three years ago. They've probably forgotten about them. As for the clap and gonorrhea and the other bullshit STDs, they can be cured in an afternoon. Seriously. Doctors have us scared so shitless of sex that we won't let any guy come within a light-year of our pussies. I'm sorry. I like guys and I like doing it with guys and the guys I do it with are really cool to me. As far as my boyfriend not wanting to "wrap it"? Come on in, Craig! The only guys I ever made wear a condom were the ones who were too stupid to pull out. I haven't seen a condom since I called bullshit on those types of guys years ago.

HUGE COMPANIES
One hundred floors of hard-working people that are generating tons of revenue for the company working 50 hours a week? Sure they are. How can you possibly monitor the work of all those Dilberts sitting in those little cubicles with their little Garfield posters and Monday jokes? Especially when the company's going through a boom and nobody cares. No wonder Enron got away with murder. You could probably surf internet porn and IM all your old high-school buddies for the rest of your life without being noticed. Big, huge companies are just a fancy word for welfare. Shit, I'm writing this thing at my job right now and I have a HUGE FUCKING PILE of purchase orders sitting next to me. I call bullshit on those, too.

SUFFOCATING SOMEONE WITH A PILLOW
Have you ever tried this? Maybe if it's your dying granddad and he's on life-support and he's basically in a coma. Maybe. But suffocating a healthy dude with a pillow? It is so easy to pull your chin into your neck and create a breathing space, there's no way you could suffocate. If someone was trying to smother me with a pillow I'd bend my mouth down towards my neck and then wriggle around like I was choking. Then I'd go all limp and hold my breath like I was dead (sucker).


Damn that felt GOOD!


What makes you call BULLSHIT??

WHO WATCHED THE...

DNC?

Thoughts??

Incase you didn't get a chance to watch it or have no idea what I'm talking about…

The Democratic National Committee (DNC) is the principal organization governing the United States Democratic Party on a day to day basis.

And tonight Senator Barack Obama gave his acceptance speech.

Within the first few moments of Senator Obama's speech he said:

"But the failure to respond is a direct result of a broken politics in Washington and the failed policies of George W. Bush."

OH SNAP!!

By posting this I am in way associating myself with the dems or any other political party, BUT…

I can't wait to see how the republicans and Fox news are going to spin this shizz!!

IT’S THAT TIME OF YEAR...

Things that I'm looking forward to this summer:

• Reading all of the books under my coffee table
• MY BF moving to Cali
• BBQ's
  
• Obtaining a kill screen on my wii
• More bike rides
• SLEEP
• Project runway
• Peeing in the ocean
  
• Slip 'n' Slides
  
• ?
• ?
• ?
• ?
  

But like, what are you going to do this summer...